not the plan...

well the weekend was an enjoyable one and seemed to go rather quickly. however i feel as though last week was one of the longest ever. it was a different experience for me hanging with the 5/6th graders. what a great group. makes me even more excited for when they move up to jr/sr high youth group.

personally i had some interesting realizations. i realized that waterparks are just a bit more fun with family. and it made me miss having mine there together. and i was surprised that matt didn't really want much to do with me...at all. this was only the 2nd time i had went with him on anything and he really managed to keep his distance. knowing kate had arrived home sunday morning made me that much more anxious for us to arrive home ourselves. i was so looking forward to being together as a family and sharing adventures. oh, how hopes can be shattered. i never in a million years would've thought that the evening would gone as it did. my son informed us he didn't like us, didn't like living with us, didn't like anything about coming home and THAT was the reason for his bad mood. he really hurt his father and it just made me sick. i've always tried to not disregard how anyone in my family says they feel. i know that there are times we say things we don't mean. however feelings from somewhere prompted the emotion that allowed the words to come out. Do i think he truly dislikes me or his father or his home...NO. if so, he wouldn't want to come here for lunch. he wouldn't rush home after school. needless to say after a looooooong conversation, initiated by him, the evening was not the homecoming i had envisioned and was not at all enjoyable.

today is a new day...
everyone is up & out of the house and i just want to sleep. so much needs to be done and i'm experiencing a downer. ugh! the sun is shining, that's a plus.