tone.

it's one of the choices you get to make. so many times the tone chosen can out do the words themselves. be careful when choosing both. for there have been many times when talking to both of my kiddos that the tone chosen has been off-putting. perhaps it's because i'm your mother that i bare the brunt of it and pray.* (*even praying for myself as i too have chosen the wrong tone)

perhaps the best way to avoid being off-putting is to be quick to listen and slow to respond. this is a lesson that typically comes with maturity, but if you can learn it sooner rather than later i'd say you'd be one up on your peers.

day 3 and this is for each of you.... SLOW DOWN!

not quite sure when i decided to do so, i think it was a gradual realization brought about by watching others, feeling the stress myself and when the moments passed feeling as though i had missed them altogether.

kathryn i've heard you say a time or two throughout the first half of your senior year that 'time flies and it seems to be going faster'. and it's so true.

matt, you're at the stage in life where all you want to do is hurry up time so that you can hop in your truck, with your dog and head to austin, tx. well i assure you it will all happen soon enough in at just the right time.

so, slow down and enjoy the ride. soak in the journey and each moment. don't fall into the worldly trap of hurry hurry hurry..... and i'll go even further and challenge you to look for, find, and admire Gods glory each and every day and in those crazy moments that will undoubtedly come your way. if you're blessed with a tomorrow know that it is for a purpose and reason.....if you're not sure what that purpose or reason is, amp up the convo's with God and build up that relationship. like any good relationship, the better you know one another the better the journey through life together. and together is far better than alone. it just makes more sense.

to my children.... so so much to tell you both. much i've shared with you a time or two. the most important thing i think you need to know is that you're beautiful people whose purpose perfectly designed by a masterful, loving God.

you are loved unconditionally by both your daddy, myself & God. His plan for you is perfect. never forget no matter how rough the waters that the plan is a perfect one. never forget to give Him the glory at all times for all things.

you'll be faced with choices daily, every min. of every day at times.....they have consequences, chose wisely.

well happy new year my loves...

2014 i'll be writing to you. not quite sure what all i'll impart but know that my intent is to leave you with tidbits that i want you to know. it's been 2 years since my mom has been gone and so many times i wish i could pick up the phone and call her and get some info. she was for sure my go to source. recipes, advice, cheering up, venting to, whatever the need she always seemed to fulfill it. i laugh when i think of the number of times i called her when i first moved away from home asking for laundry advice. #1 question...."is it hot or cold water that sets color/stains?" finally after what was probably the 1001 phone call for the answer to that question i decided to write it down....in the We Care cookbook from which she pulled many of her recipes. still to this day i'd have to reference the front inside cover to get the answer and in my hand writing i can hear her voice dictate the instructions.(i'll be sure to share them with you..... )

first thing i wanna start with is to you, andy. i want to thank you for making the choice to love me. in the beginning of this journey we both had choices to make and daily i'm thankful you chose me. there's much to be said for common core values and sharing a vision of what you want from this journey with another. we had major commonalities and minor differences. we balance each other for sure.

i love the example we've set for our children. we've kept it real and honest. you've been a great dad, husband and provider. you've worked hard. i think one of the reasons we've come to love Christmastime so much is because the kids and i know we're gonna all be together for family time. it may not always be fun & games (as you hate games) but there's a comfort in knowing that we're all under one roof. this Christmastime was all the more special as it's our last guaranteed one with us all together. hard to believe or baby girl is off to college this fall.

so as commonplace as it may sound i want you to know that i love you. i want you. and i am so looking forward to the rest of our journey. i'm glad we chose to do this thing call life & love together!

i've said it many times before folks....life is about choices. some are big and will forever change your life. some will forever change the life of others and some seem so small and insignificant it's hard to imagine they would ever impact anyone......not so. every choice has a repercussion....a ripple effect. may you choose to send a wave of smiles into this world.

words with a purpose ....that's what i'm gonna shoot for in 2014. it's gonna be a big year for the vanness family. kathryn will be graduating, moving away for college and our home for the later half of the year will be just the 3 of us. weird! i've no idea if my kids or husband read this....ever, but if they do i want them to be able to take something away from it. thus, my blog focus for 2014 will be words for them. something for them to have and hold on to. something for them to reflect upon. something to make them laugh or smile perhaps when i'm not around. just a little piece of me that i'd like to share with them.

so that's that.  i'm not sick. don't plan on making my way from the world or anything like that ....but let's be real....you never know. just covering my bases and whatnot. i am looking forward to this little project. hope you enjoy it as well.... 

blessing to you all friends......

a year in review.....

brought the year in with friends.....cruised for the first time ever and loved it.....moved into our dream home....summer was enjoyable and slow.....both kids had jobs for the first time.....lost my bestest furry buddy, and still cry about it today....turned 47....enjoyed fireworks at "moms" with the gang....began sr. year & sophomore year adventures....welcomed a new relationship for my girl....tried our hand at hosting- got the short straw :(....returned to our family of 4....and have slowed down and vowed to take it slow and enjoy the ride.

as we ring in 2014 although uncertain of what all it will bring, i've said it before and will say it again...it will be just as God planned. prayers for all my family and friends that they too will know the peace that comes with a relationship with God. prayers that perspective and common sense will prevail and enjoyable moments will be off the charts.

peace!

His will....

I think one of the things I value most about my relationship with Christ is knowing that His will is perfect. There's so much imperfection in this world and at times it can seem as though people are standing in line to point out your imperfections. There's some who will be the first i line to tell you where you've gone wrong and how you can improve. These type of folk used to really get under my skin. Until I fully bought into, believed that Gods will, His plan is perfect. Now I opt to think of those who are quick to judge, correct, or berate are not so much "under my skin" but more of a topical rash.

Over the course of the last year I've been changed. Not by my own doing mind you but the kind of change that only the Lord can bring about. And I'm thankful for that. I've learned to listen closely to what's being said. And those times when critical words come my way I've tried to be less reactive and more reflective about what's being said and by whom. And then I'm contemplative and prayerful as to what, if anything I should do with the words and at times attitudes. Many many many times I just pray. Prayers for clarity, understanding but most importantly that what/how ever I react that I'm pleasing to Him and it's in line with His will. The end result?......a sense of peace. Peace in knowing that there's a reason for all things and that there's a plan and that no matter what my plan may be, His is far better than anything I could ever imagine for myself. For I'm a daughter of the one true King, and what loving father wants anything less for their child.

His will....well, that's for certain a relationship perk especially when you trust in it. 

Oil & Water

How is it possible that early on in life a person, a child can feel a complete disconnect from a group of people? Is it possible? Or is it a manifestation of a child being stubborn and refusing to 'get along' with others? This has been something I've tossed about in my mind for years! As long as I can remember actually. For this child I'm talking about is me, yours truly.

My earliest memory of some people in my life is that my relationship with them wasn't warm and fuzzy as it probably should've been. I'm talking a grandma, aunts, uncles, cousins....family. I just wasn't fond of them as my family and/or society for that matter would dictate I should be. I recall many fits on my part when I'd have to interact with some of these people. I faked sickness so that I could stay home and avoid gatherings. I gladly took punishment for being rude, mean, and unkind. I totally knew better, but I just couldn't shake what I was feeling. It was a feeling too great to deny.

I felt alone in my feelings. I would watch my brother who's 7 years older than me interact with those who I found less than desirable, looking all the while for a clue. Some sort of clue that would allow me to justify my feelings. I don't know that I ever received it...at least not definitively.

Is it possible that a kid can be so intuitive? I believe I've commented before in a blog that I'm a person who tends to take notice. I listen, observe and more times than not draw a conclusion. And I've done this from quite an early age. I feel comfortable with that. I trust those feelings. And then when I take into account comments overheard regarding me as a child I've became reassured in what I felt. But it didn't make it any easier.

Fast forward to age 16. When I learned of my grandmas involvement in my fathers extra-marital affair. Instinct.....CONFIRMED. Throughout the course of the divorce process, time and time again my instinctual feelings, or opinions as some would say, were validated. It wasn't at all a satisfying feeling rather more compounded sadness.

Fast forward to present day. And my take is this....it's weird. Only now in a different way.

I've ran into cousins many times while out and about and experience a flood of emotions. Some I've missed terribly. Hated that ways have parted, our children don't know one another etc.... I've ran into aunts and uncles.....only to be coolly acknowledged. And there have been those who've passed, who's funerals I missed only because I didn't want to upset anyone with my presence. That's been upsetting and still is today. You see, there was that one aunt who reached out, made me feel welcomed, apart and wanted to know me as an adult and my family. I never said goodbye to her. That's tough. And there are those who I'm left wondering why? Why we/I don't connect.

I'm 47 and haven't a clue. Still to this day I cannot put my finger on what it is that causes a gap. I wonder if they feel the same? I wonder if they give it any thought at all.

Some people, like oil & water just aren't meant to mesh, get along, enjoy one another. Perhaps that's our story. Just like not all family is blood, not all family relationships are easy and in some cases not possible. For some they're like oil and water.

She's growing up! That in itself is a blessing. We're still somewhat early in her senior year and I find myself reminiscing with each step taken. I'm taking a boat load of pictures and reflecting with each one. I find myself also thinking about the classmates and friends who pose with Kat and those who might end up in the background. The trip down memory lane is being quite enjoyable and the unknown of the future is exciting.

In many ways Kat has really branched out this year. Not sure what switch was flipped, but it's been one that has let her branch out in many ways. I'd say it all began on the Marion Civic theater stage. What started out as my summer adventure quickly turned into her own adventure. It was fun to see her out of her element, with a varied cast of characters and thrive! It was as though she was blooming right before my eyes. Next thing you know she's found her way into the high school show choir, scored a vocal solo as well and had a successful audition for the school play. A dinner theater type of a show for which she managed to land a lead role. WOW. Totally new adventures for and with out a doubt she'll enjoy each one to its fullest.

The up & coming months will be equally as interesting. Of course there's the cheer gig, but throw into the mix concerts, contests, the Macy Parade performance, the start of basketball season, and finding out and deciding where she'll be attending college next fall is all so exciting. And with the addition of new friends and adventures it's sure to be a trip and one worth taking.

In the pic above many things stand out to me. Of course there's Kat & her daddy. Her number 1 guy for sure. And then there's Eli. That kid will always have a place in her heart and I'm not quite sure he knows it. From challenging her in the 1st grade, ignoring her crush (if he ever really knew at all) in the 3rd grade, to being someone she prays for continually, he will always be pretty special to her. The pic of her and Braelyn stands out to me for a number of reasons. Kat refers to their relationship as "frenimies". She says they both share in a dislike of one another, yet every now and again they seem to go to each other with random thoughts, feelings, and what not. I know Kat would do anything for her. As for the pic with the other girls, I have to admit when I first saw this pic I was taken back a bit. I look at it and I see untapped potential and at times I wonder why relationships/friendships never really developed between them. For Lexi was a classmate and attends the same church as Kat and Allie and Kat came to know one another through dance while in elementary and then she transferred to Oak Hill schools in high school. This year they will be cheering together and I know Kat has enjoyed getting to know Allie in that environment. And then there's the pic of Kat alone sporting her beautiful smile and the #75. Not sure what all that relationship will bring about or develop into but hey, if she's happy, I'm happy. I will say I approve. New territory for sure.

Life is an adventure. Being given the opportunity to live it is a blessing. I'm so happy to see Kat living it up and taking advantage of all the experiences that come with being a high school student. For this is it! Her one shot! And knowing she taking chances, opening herself up and living it up is exciting. My prayer is that the smile not fade but only continues to grow.

Loving life and it's blessings!

Well today begins day 5.  What a whirlwind these past 2 weeks have been!  From a group e-mail I opened 2 monday's ago, to casual convo with andy about the possibility, to kat making the final selection, to being told by the school it most likely wouldn't happen to a late night text that it was looking promising, to a 12pm wednesday confirmation, finally connecting on thursday, home visit on friday, factor in opening week of oliver and then she arrived!  and a day early to boot! whew!  don't know when i've been so excited, anxious, overwhelmed, etc.... WOW! 

She left her home monday and traveled to munich, washington dc, chicago and arrived in ft. wayne on wednesday.  Exhausted! Excited! Anxious! Nervous & Overwhelmed! as well!  Thursday was busy running errands and oliver, friday we visited the school for paperwork and chilled, saturday kids went to the splash house for one last bit of summer fun and as a family all took in oliver! The evening was topped off with a sleep over!  I can only hope friendships were made/strengthened!

I believe that all the emotion and what not are finally catching up with Katya. :(  Unaccustomed to the air condition, she has been dealing with a sore throat. And appeared a tired last night.  boo! Hope recovery takes place soon! As today will involve church and some back to school fun at youth group!

Back to school is looming! a.k.a. chaos!  :)  how exciting this year will be!  anxious to get it underway and attempt to develop a pseudo schedule so that additional bonding can happen with our new addition!

As this journey is unfolding I can't help to contemplate what life is like for a family 1/2 around the globe who is down 1 at their own table.  I can only hope that the conversations that we've had have helped to put them at ease.  Additionally I hope that I'm granted the necessary words to calm, ease, soothe any angst that Katya might feel. 

Praising the Lord for this, His plan for our lives and trusting in Him for all that we will learn/love from it! 

....wising I could speak Georgian! :)

She's here! :)  What a whir-wind of a week!  For all involved!  9 days ago we decided to host an exchange student. Were discouraged that our school would likely not accept anymore at this time, became hopeful again that it was going to happen and 8 days ago received confirmation we were a go!  Much paperwork, many phone calls, a home inspection, a beautiful young lady form a 1/2 a world away made her way to the USA and into our home as well as our hearts!

Prior to her arrival we were able to connect on FB and even video chat with one another!  Family to family!  I can only begin to imagine the anxiety her parents are experiencing!  A school year is a long time and the distance is great when someone you love dearly is gone.  I feel happy that we were able to talk because I so wanted to help calm their nerves so that they might experience a sense of peace. 

Almost home: (in the USA)

Ft. Wayne Int'l airport arrival 4:16 (30 min late mind you) pm.  She's here!  I quickly glanced at my own family and self included the smiles were ear to ear!  I greeted her with a huge hug (of course) and she gave each of us one in return!  and then the tears!  Of joy, relief, excitement, everything all bubbling up and over!  All the while with the biggest smile I've ever seen!  Even through the exhaustion she managed to talk the whole way home!  The kids gave her a quick tour of the property, a 4-wheel ride, moved her bed, and she presented her gifts!  Supper included a couple of firsts!  She had both pizza- without cheese first as she doesn't care for dairy, but said she would try a piece with cheese as well. ( & that her mom would be proud of her as her mom loves pizza).  SUCCESS! She loved both pizza without the cheese AND the pizza with the cheese!  And according to her "i'm am happy!"  We were all happy!  As we eat a lot of pizza!  How did I not get a picture of this :( FAIL! 
Ed & EJ joined us for the evening.  She brought traditional snacks, coffee mugs, wine vessels, caps for the men, t-shirt for matt and necklaces for kat & I and a beautiful compact for EJ.  So thoughful!

I hope to find a balance in the arena of  time.  I don't want to overwhelm her and want to allow her the time to have the experiences she hopes to.  And I'm certain it'll all work out!  What a year this is gonna be!  I'm beyond excited!

a whole new world

So if you've followed my blogging at all you know that i'm a firm believer that ALL things are part of the bigger plan. With that said, I am yet again amazed at how God has connected me/us to another family 1/2 a world away.

This is how it came to be....

While at dress rehearsal on Monday evening i reviewed my email and was deleting many when i came across one whose subject line read "11 host families needed". I opened the email and there was an expressed urgent need for host families for foreign exchange students. I didn't bother to open any of the profiles but for some reason didn't delete them either. Tuesday morning, I went straight to the email. I opened the profiles one by one, read through them all but kept coming back to the very first one I opened. Ekaterine from Georgia. I can't explain what specifically drew me back to her profile but I've learned to not question those things anymore. After reading through all the profiles I asked Andy if he'd want to host and didn't even get to finish expressing the need when he was quick to answer YES! I asked him again, sure he had misunderstood the question. Again, he said "yes". I awoke Kat and mentioned it to her and without hesitation she too said YES! Matt was at work at the time so he had no say. With that said all have expressed an interest in being a host family for sometime so I felt certain that he'd be on board!

Who to host?!? I had Kat make the final decision. I had her look at a few profiles that I had narrowed down and was sure to not express my preference with her. She too chose Ekaterine. With the decision made I made the call and spent the next 48 hours jumping through the proverbial hoops to get things in order so that our newest family member could join us!

"No, we're not going to accept anymore exchange students" that was what was said when I registered the kids for school and we were in the middle of processing. "no" ugh! he had to be kidding!. With a deep breath I encouraged him to be prayerful and I chose to be optimistic! As the day progressed I received a bit of encouragement from another host family and more 'hoop jumping' took place.

Noon 7/31 came the "YES" we had hoped for! With a 5pm deadline for application/placement and ticketing, the limits were being pushed! We were in an approved, holding pattern! And then word....Done & Done! Home visit will take place on 8/2 and we'll receive contact info.

7:00am 8/2: Andy awoke me with a phone call and I anxiously checked email hoping there would be something from/or about her but not sure what. AND THERE WAS! Happy is an understatement. She's beautiful, seems outgoing, and I can't wait for her arrival!

After our chatting I was also able to chat with her father! He and her mother are so excited and nervous for their daughter. This is for sure going to be a most memorable experience and living it out will be a blessing for sure.

God has made this possible without a doubt! And it's going to be so fun. A half a world away two families are joining and an amazing adventure is about to take place!

hold on .....here we go!

Perfection is most certainly undefined and is most likely ever changing.  That excites me.  I've never really been one to strive for perfection as I'm not a huge fan of disappointment.  Yesterday however was pretty close to perfection.  The plan: a day on a boat with good friends.  The plan was a success.  It's hard to call a day perfect when my kiddo's are not involved yet yesterday was pretty close. Everything just played out perfectly.  Andy & I were able to sleep until we no longer needed to.  Matt had the opportunity to work and called me on his lunch break all excited because he had made $30 in tips in his first hour!  Not bad for a 15 year old...$37.25 is pretty outstanding for one hour of work!  Kat picked up hours as well, which is a good thing as she's planning for spring break 2014 and has a plane ticket to buy!  That left Andy & I to have our own adventure.  It was a most beautiful date day boating on the reservoir and wrapping up the day with some BBQ from Jefferson St. in Converse.  YUM!  And then we relaxed.  ....even more!   Kat came home, Matt spent the night with his 2 favorite people (Ed & Ej) and with the setting of a gorgeous sun the day was done.  Perfection ....at least for me, for the day!

Today hasn't been too far off.  Even though I'm cleaning I feel lucky to get to do so.  I'm in the home of our dreams, things are not too messy!  (major accomplishment) Andy is willing and able to do stuff outside as well and tonight Kat & I will return to MCT for continued rehearsal for OLIVER!

I'm astounded how quickly time is flying by!  Over the course of the next month the following events will take place....register for school my Sr. & Soph, Stroup & Cox reunions, Cheer camp, AND applying to college!  WOW!  throw in a few bon fires, over-nighters, and a supper club outing and wowzeers we've got a fun filled month ahead of us!  I'm so excited for each upcoming day!  So many opportunities for fun and fellowship with others!

There are sure to be downs to accompany the ups but knowing each moment passes and God willing we're blessed with new ones it's hard to not to get excited for all that is in store.

Blessings all...

so many choices in life and for a contemplative person like myself all the choices leads me to think, think and rethink.  aaaarrrrggggghhhhh!  in my 47 years i've concluded a few things 1) i am the only one in control of my happiness.  i choose.  2) in every moment i have a choice.  i choose. 

truthfully i've learned more than that.  one little tid bit that i've garnered is that life is too short, and such a blessing that i've decided to take mine back from this world and give it all to God.  and it's totally working for me.  but, not without effort on my part.  i broke this life thing down and concluded for every day He blesses me with, every moment for that matter, i have a choice. 

this world and this life no matter your position throws so much at you and often without end.  things break, others can be less than pleasant, the road gets rough and things just don't go as planned not to mention unplanned illness'.  that too has been a lesson learned.  with all that said i choose how i react to all of it. 

it's not always easy and i don't always succeed.  but i've decided to continue down that path.  as a result i'd say i'm happier, calmer, a lot less angry & annoyed and all of that make for enhanced blessings.  not necessarily more blessings but a greater appreciation for what is my world. 

 lesson 3) not everyone in 'your world' is willing to share in your happiness, appreciate your happiness.  lesson 4) my world is ever changing.  interestingly enough i'm a fan of change.  and it's comforting to know that i get to be in control of how i choose to respond to the changes that come my way. 

if only i would've learned this lesson earlier on i believe much grief could have been avoided, yet much of what has transpired in my life has brought me to the frame of mind i'm in today.  God knows my path and He is who i trust implicitly.  whatever comes my way i will get through.  i will not be alone nor will He forsake me.  it's a give, give relationship.

i choose to live for Him.  i hope to be a light.  and lesson 5)  kindness is so much easier to put out, far more enjoyable when it comes back and leaves you with zero regrets when it's not accepted. 

so what are your thoughts?  what lessons have you learned? 

time sure does fly when you're having fun!  and when you get older!  and when you have much to do! *sigh*

passed on the rummages this year....i like going to them but don't like doing them!  AT ALL!  i'm amazed and a bit in awe of those who do! seriously.... they're a ton of effort just prepping for them and then you are tethered to them until closing time! just. can't. do. it!  A) 'cause i'm a sloth B) 'cause i don't want to and C) 'cause I'm a sloth...still!   L.A.Z.Y.   my mom was dead on with that call!  i've decided to just embrace it because after all it would take substantial effort on my part to make a change. 

kat started off right away working this summer.  she scored a gig as a life guard at the splash house and for the first couple of weeks i had matt & mom time!  <3 15="" 1="" 2="" a="" accomplished="" all="" and="" another="" applications="" around="" be="" because="" been="" believe="" both="" brilliant="" car="" could="" day="" days="" decided="" do="" don="" dropping="" drove="" encouraging="" ever="" except="" eyes="" felt="" for="" gathering="" giddy="" gonna="" great="" had="" happy="" he="" him="" hire="" hired="" his="" i="" idea="" in="" it="" know="" later.....he="" little="" lol="" mid="" mom="" moment="" nbsp="" obtaining="" of="" off.="" old="" only="" p="" proud="" real="" right="" s="" see="" seriously="" so="" t="" take="" taller="" that="" the="" them="" then="" through="" to="" total="" trying="" ve="" walked="" wanted="" was="" wash="" way="" week="" when="" while="" who="" work.="" year="">
fathers day of course came and went.  to celebrate ed and andy we dined out before the IN/KY allstar basketball game.  we enjoyed italian fare at bella vita on giest.  it was yummy but lunch menu had fewer options.  my dad ...well, i assume he was released from the hospital and i'll also assume he received the card i mailed him.

o.h.s.c. ventured north to warsaw and enjoyed amazing food at Noa Noa! omg so good!  so it's in the books for a return visit from the van ness family. 

today is june 26.  arrgghhh!  can't believe it's the end of the first month of summer break.  kat leaves saturday for church camp, she's a counselor again this year.  as a result she will miss our annual fireworks, my birthday and will be extending her absence to be with her friends at the lake.  :(  glad she's enjoying herself by selfishly missing her.  ...that's normal. right?

hoping to spend the 4th with andy at shipshewana.  i'll be 47 that day.  i'm kinda excited about that.  minus the fat knees and occasional body aches i'm digging the growing old process.  what i'm not digging is the angst that's been developing as time passes. double aaarrrrgggghhhh!  not a big fan of that out of control feeling.

tomorrow marks the 20th day without elly.  ....miss her like crazy.  with that said, toby has come to the homestead.  matt is the proud owner of the new guy, a black lab. he's 6 weeks old and seems to be enjoying his new digs.  he has some mighty big shoes to fill.

so june has certainly been eventful with a road trip with the ohsc ladies to shipshe followed by another road trip with heather to meet one of our mutually favorite authors jen lancaster!!! i totally tried to avoid appearing too FANtastic :) and just be super casual about our meeting.  ....well i'm guessing i failed.  you see i told her "i like your brain"!!  who says that?   ....me, 'cause i'm a goob.

so yeah, june was fun and fast and july is 'bout to be jumpin!  and august....well, that will mark the beginning of the end.  applications 8/1 to colleges, sr. year starting & soph. year for the boy!  how is it possible.  the angst is mounting.  eek!

feeling as though it's gonna be a fast & furious ride.

memorial day was like a comma...,

,

That's the best way to describe Memorial day 2013, a comma.  A pause.  A much needed break in the action that is our crazy, busy, fun, tiring, rewarding, blessed lives.  WOW WHAT A WEEKEND! What a month, What a year (thus far).

A remodel completed, new house purchased, an ill timed cruise, a move, a 2nd remodel started, and continued moving of stuff, setting up house, making it our own, 12 hours a week of mowing, end of school year activities and the kick off of summer.  whew!

This weekend was a mixture of all!  but mostly it served as a reminder of our many blessings!  Kat enjoyed lake time with best friends before one graduates, travels and prepares to move for school, poor matt was laid up fighting of exhaustion and a cold while andy & I continued with the norm and threw in additional fun in prepping for OHSC family night at our house!  fun!

Our first official summertime party was a success!  Food consisted of wild hog roasted (as killed by andy while he & juan were on their hunting expedition) 3 whole chickens bbq'd to perfection, mac & cheese, baked beans, 3-bean salad, corn casserole, ramen noodle salad, chips & dips, dump cake, cherry pie, strawberry shortcake x's 2 versions, caramel corn and veggie pizza.  The pouring rains held off allowing for fun by the bonfire and cornhole!  What a day spent with some of the best friends anyone could ask for!  (&family)

And then came Monday and the rain which seemed to bring about the pause.  Each awoke on their own time and went about their own business.  Andy for the first time in YEARS just sat and I was thankful.  Dvr'd Duck Dynasty combined with a Pawn Stars marathon made for a relaxing day for him.  Kat caught up on her sleep and left midday for a study group prepping for finals.  Matt...well made occasional appearances for sustenance only!  I casually continued the never ending job that is laundry, fell asleep in a soothing bath, made some filling goulosh, and enjoyed my family, our home and thought about my momma often....with a smile of course. 

The benefit of a 'comma' type day.....well I'd say a peaceful next morning.  I can't bring myself to say time was wasted, or a day of work lost because of how our day went.  Time is precious and our time was spent together.  Perhaps not 100% engaged together but for the most part we were here and available.  Do yourself a favor and enjoy a comma of a day every now and again!  It does the body, mind and family good! 

Happy summer every one!

948-5563

Well momma, today's the day!  Oh my goodness I can hardly believe it.  I'm imagining our conversation and your excitement for all of us!  Your expressing concern over the added distance thus additional time it will take to get to your house to see you, but knowing you're happy that we're happy.  I know you'd probably have a surprise of a wreath or some sort of decoration for the new place!  I purposely saved some items and supplies just so I could do exactly that.  (....although not even close to as lovely as what you could do.)

Golly I sure do miss you!  It's weird to think that life just.....goes on.  I miss most our conversations!  We could talk (&argue) about any and everything.  Man I miss that!

And the kids...Matthew turns 15 in 2 days and Kathryn 17 in a couple of weeks!  You would've celebrated 76!  I'm holding onto the hope (fact!) that you're celebrating your 2nd heavenly birthday in your pain free body!  That thought alone brings me joy!  And of course that you're no longer 'alone' rather you're with grandpa & grandma....a family again!

I pray you continue to watch over us and hope to you visit me again soon!

Miss and love you loads momma!

I'll talk to you later!

well many of you who read my blogs or know me personally know that in a week or two (or 3) we will be moving.  not far mind you but to a new, to us, home.  i'll be a country girl for the first time.  we will no longer be residents of grant county.  or for that matter a part of the oak hill community...at least by address standards.  and as most of you know i'm beyond excited, overwhelmed with the task and even more overwhelmed with the blessing.  i've driven by the home many times.  i've taken friends and family by it and even assisted a good friend who doesn't enjoy driving, at all....in finding the house from her own so that she can come by and chill with me like i do to her!  i even took my mom by the house shortly after we put an offer on it.  she passed 2 months later.  she'll never get to visit there and the mother-in-law residence on the property will not be occupied by her but nonetheless she knows where we'll be.

and that's the thing about this move.... there are those who i want to know where we'll be.  for without a doubt the new place is 'out of the way'.  in the middle of nowhere and on your way to no place.  :)  ....kinda like swayzee only w/o the neighbors and much more land.  but i wonder....i wonder if my father will ever try to find me.  for i'm just curious.

there's just no pleasing some people and over time my desire to do so diminishes.

as this happens to me i wonder what Jesus' position would be when dealing with some folk. for i've been kind, used kind words, have traded curiosity for judgement and yet i am approaching exhaustion.  my psyche is taking a beating and i wonder how much longer must i remain in the proverbial boxing ring?

it's as if satan has moved away from me directly and is taking the pot shots at me via another?  you know... through one who perhaps is less likely to call on His name as the ugliness of this world sets in. and so i reflect on myself...am i a part of the ugliness? if so Father forgive me and wash it away for i do not want any part of that to be what i put out for it is not reflective of You.

so i will be prayerful.  i will take comfort in knowing this is part of a plan....a plan that is perfect.

and i will continue to be me....a work in progress.

well....the time is upon us!  i'm so full of emotion and what not i don't even know where to begin!  so many thoughts going through my head....proud of my husband and all of his hard work and sacrifice...over 2 years worth!  there's not a doubt in my mind that when the time is right the house in amboy will sell and he shall reap his reward!  ....excited for my family!  1yr & 9 mos. later we will be  moving into our dream home!  a beautiful home that satisfies all our needs and wants.  situated on just under 8 acres it has the barns and out buildings that appeal to my husband as well as beautiful landscaping, mature trees, hills and a meandering stream.  i used to lose him to work in amboy and was sad and now i look forward to losing him to work 'in the barns' and can't wait!  it's truly his dream place and there's not a man alive that deserves it more than him.  he has cared for this family in so many ways...he's nothing short of amazing.  ....can't wait to decorate! but totally feel like i'll be in over my head.  i'm not sure of the look i'm going for but am looking forward to finding it out.  ...i'm looking forward to dinners at our table, a revolving back/front door for friends and family, movie nights, bon fires, walks to my friends' houses & back home again - totaling 6mi walked!!!! :)  thank you very much!...

i keep thinking how happy i am that i was able to show mom where it was....because she'll know where to find me.

This is our soon to be new home.  Please come and visit....anytime!  It's a little out of the way, but what's a bit of distance between family & friends.