the title of this post...It's Tuesday!

Hello Mr. Obvious, it's Tuesday.  Nothing too special about today.  Just gonna take this time to get some things outta my head.

I was excited that I had a message from Kat this morning.  In addition to buying a biscuit, she bout shoes.  Really expensive shoes she said!  Leaving her enough money for her 1 meal a day (she thinks).  I feel partly responsible for this.  You see the shoes were Lacoste and only sold in Paris thus mandating the purchase.  Some how without having ever purchasing for her any Lacoste items, as they can be hard to come by and expensive, I have managed to share with her my love for ALL things Lacoste thus I'm sure without a doubt causing her to see the value in the shoe and desire to have it!  I've never had nor seen a Lacoste shoe but am sure it's splendid!  (think I'll google a pic as soon as I am done here) Ok, couldn't wait on the google, and no matter the style they're GONNA ROCK!  I can't wait to see them!  *Ahhh the finer things!*

Later today Matt & I are gonna go to the movies!  What a blessing to have time to be with him daily.  I've learned so much about my son.  However, I had to go through pics from 5-10 years ago for Andy and in doing so I noticed (sadly) that as the years passed it seemed as though the joy in my sons eyes did too.  Heartbreaking.  I called Andy in to show him what I was seeing, asked if he noticed it too and he did.  He attributed it to just being a boy and growing up.  I wasn't so convinced.  It really caused my heart to ache.  The upside, I think I see the joy returning.  Matthew is certainly a special young man who is wise beyond his years and probably one of the most gentle tender-hearted young guys I know.  Qualities that can be difficult for his peers to appreciate but will certainly pay-off in life.  He'll be a great husband and father someday for sure!

So glad it didn't freeze last night.  I bought a hanging flower for Moms grave on Sunday and was worried a frost would do it in.  I need to get one for Grandma & Grandpas too!  It seemed weird not to have something on theirs.  Perhaps this weekend.

I get overwhelmed at times when I think about what it would be like with my grandparents still around.  Man would they ever love my kids!  I feel certain that Matthew and my papa Ike would be the best of buddies!  And Kathryn would've been the one to learn how to make grandmas pie crust and noodles.

As I think about the future and reflect on the past of this journey - being a wife and mother, I often find myself giving great consideration to both the past examples and future opportunities.  When it comes to being a wife, I feel as though I'm floundering.  Garnering from examples set I: avoid nagging, arguments, and being the boss.  I take a back seat, offer my opinion and respect his and I love.  When it comes to the mom gig I just try to do what I can and love love love.  It is for sure the easiest and hardest thing to do all in one.  There are many areas in which I feel I've dropped the ball but other areas that I feel I've been quite successful.  I've learned over time that the most important thing for me is to be real and to be real about the things in this life that really matter.  ie, our relationships - with God and each other.

Some times I panic when I think about the years and how they fly by.  There's so much I want to do and do with my family and I feel as though in no time at all it'll be tomorrow and time and opportunity will have fleeted away.  I hate that feeling.  For it was just yesterday or so it seems this journey was just beginning.

Spring has sprung

Well it has happened, my least favorite season...Spring.  And it has come on disguised as Summer!  We did the abnormal 'spring forward' with the changing of the clocks and without fail this left everyone additionally sleepy.  And then it happened.  Record breaking high temps in the mid to upper 80's for over a week!  Temperatures that shattered a 106 yo record!  For the hour lost of sleep Mr. Sun decided to perk everyone up and shine shine shine!

March is flying by.  Kathryn has been in Europe, Paris to be exact for 4 days now!  I've spoken to her once (she bought a biscuit), and creeped endlessly on the pictures she and her schoolmates/tripmates are posting.  If they're smiles are any indication they are having a fabulous time and the weather seems to be beautiful.  And she can check "Paris in the Springtime" off her bucket list if it was on there!  (jealous!  but glad we could send her) In addition Kathryn will be taking on a J O B! when she returns.  She'll be working at Culver's in Marion and is so excited to earn her own cash!  I know the feeling and must admit I miss earning my own also.  When she does return she has a big week ahead of her.  Cheerleading tryouts will take place M-Thurs. with the results on Friday (i assume).  She's hoping to make Varsity for both football & basketball since her group of girls decided to tryout for both.  It's bound to be interesting.  On the 29th while in Heidelberg Germany Kathryn will turn 16!  This will make for her 2nd international birthday! 

Matthew has started a new past time.  Golf.  He'll be a part of the OH golf club team.  And, he loves it.  I am so glad.  I totally don't get it which might be one reason for his growing passion for it, but I do know I'll be supportive of it!  We can officially be done with his schooling soon!  But he has decided, if it's OK with me to start reading the Biology text book I bought for him and to continue doing some math stuff!  I secretly think he's bored!  He'll be returning to public school in the fall.  It was never our intent to home school but as a parent sometimes you have to take a stand, make a statement and sometimes it has to be a dramatic one.  It was an easy choice.....1) it was for my son, & 2) it was the right thing to do.  Preaching intolerance to bulling is one thing, to practice it is another.

Yesterday was a somber one as it would've been my moms 75th birthday.  Golly I miss her a ton.  And this coming Sunday 4/1 will be the auction of my moms estate.  This has all been so emotional.  And like always I keep everything in (for the most part) smile, say it's all OK and go on.  Truth....not so convinced or sure I'm all that OK.  I just don't know.  I wish I knew what/how to feel.  I know I'm off my game because I feel out of touch with me.  Thank goodness for my big God who knows me well.....for I feel as though I'm walking on faith alone.

I'm anxiously awaiting summer.  Not sure why exactly other than I look forward to the time with my kids.  I love and enjoy them so.  I forecast a lot of trips to the golf course and to Culver's this summer.  And if it is to be I'll be setting up house, starting anew in our new home.  My God has this all under control.  Even when I'm mad as a hornet at Him, He manages to gently remind me.....He has a plan.

Well, to day is Monday, Andy is up north for the next few days and today I am doing NOTHING of importance just taking some me time.  Tomorrow, my son is taking me on a date and I think I am having lunch with my Aunt Phyllis, sister-in-law Kim and Betty Hurt in celebration of Kim's 50th birthday that was on Saturday.  A year ago, we were out with mom doing the same.

Times.....they are a changing.

Happy Spring all!  .....I think it's the season to be a little "sprung".

God Bless.
kel

I can only imagine...

I can only imagine what a birthday in heaven is like.  And in doing so many visions come to mind worldly and out-of-this-worldly.  What it must be like to be with those who have gone before and your heavenly Father all together.  I hear a choir of angels singing a rousing rendition of Happy Birthday, and envision the very breath of heaven extinguishing the candles.  My vision goes back and forth from something very animated and sweet as thought it were from the movie Bambi or Snow White, to Mtv's Sweetest, Blingiest birthday bash ever! And is she celebrating number 75 or 1?  I think 1. 

No matter the details I do know today you are without pain.  Today you are not alone.  Today you are remembered here.  Today you are missed. 

If there's food in heaven I hope you're enjoying the finest steak grilled by the master!  If there's a celebration of you in heaven today I hope you know that one day I too hope to join in that celebration.  But since I'm here I'll take today to remember you, privately celebrate you and thank God for you as my Mom, and my friend.

Happy birthday Momma,

I love you loads!  Miss you bunches.

kel

irony....

So i've had my panties justly in a wad recently regarding bullying in our schools. I know I know, it's goes on everywhere and many feel it's just an aspect of life that is to be tolerated or dealt with in the 'suck it up' manner.  Well, I'm intolerant to it and have never been one for sucking it up when it comes to an injustice. 

So here is the irony....

While perusing my FB news feed an ad pops up in the side bar to become friends with Children First at Oak Hill.  Now this is a page that was started just over a year or so ago in response to a referendum being brought to the voters of this community.  And as the name of the page would suggest those who were members of this group (as well as others who were not - myself included in the later) have the best interest of the children/students within our school system.  Well, you know what they say, curiosity killed the cat - right?  So with that in mind I did what any curious person would do and clicked on the group which took me straight to the groups page and wall.  And what do I find you ask?  Post after Post of mistreated, abused ....................




wait for it................








ANIMALS!

Now, in the groups defense, I'm sure they still have the well being of our kids at heart and it's very possible the moderator has been on some sort of a sabbatical or worse hacked.  However, the irony wasn't lost on me.  Rather it caused me to ponder....

What if, at the end of each school day the bullied child returned home, posted their photo along with the photo of the bully and gave a brief description of the hell they endured that day and what was or wasn't done about it. 

I love animals but love people more.  Many are quick to stand up for those beings who don't have a voice, ie a pet, but what about those kids whose voice goes unheard? 

I really feel compelled to do something other than post the random status update, vent to a select group of friends, or blog about it.  It's a problem.  And these kids mean more to me than any job, or public opinion regarding myself.  Bullying is rampant, and wrong.  It affects this community and turning a blind eye and deaf ear to the problem isn't the answer.  People need to be talking about it and calling for a change. 

I'm all for saving a dog or cat but put much more value in the life of a child.

just saying! 

948-5563

Hey Mom,

It's seems like it's been forever!  aaahhhh!  so much going on it seems and well, you know me plan & procrastinate! 

Kim has been AMAZING!  She has worked so hard going through the house!  No way could i have done it!  So much stuff and you know how I hate stuff!  The attic is cleaned out.  I'll never for the life of me understand why the stuff that was up there was kept!  As for the stuff on the main floor well, it's all been divided up and/or sent off to the auction site. 

It was hard.  I didn't like it.  And I miss you terribly.

Matt's birthday is in a few days.  I keep hearing your voice wishing him a happy birthday and asking me what he would like to have.  I'm guessing this year it would be more time with you. 

There's so much going on this week!  It's one that would for sure result in multiple phone calls from me during drive time to & fro and through out the course of my day just to keep me sane. 

We were hoping to have the sale on your birthday but had to push it back a week to April fools day. 

I'm not sure how you'd feel about others buying your stuff.  But I know there was no way Eric & I could have just assumed it all. 

Well, I just wanted to say "hey".  I love you and miss you a ton.

I'll talk to you later.  Feel free to pay me a visit!  :)

The apple and the tree...

Just how far from the tree must the apple fall for individuality to kick in?

So much of our early development comes from what our parents teach us.  Then come those forma-table years when other adults lend their personalities and character to our influences.  Followed by the teen years where we really go in search of ourselves and attempt to establish our personality and character.  And then the real world.

I remember early conversations with my daughter regarding peers and their chosen conduct and specifically remember saying to her "you have to keep in mind they only know what they see, hear and are taught at home.  You need to be the example of how you want to be treated in the manner in which you treat them"  Over and over and over again this conversation took place.  And while giving it I too had to pause and reflect on my own actions, words, reactions to things happening in my world that might be in conflict with what I was telling her.  (gut checks are not fun)

And here we are, in the midst of the teenage years for both of my kids and we have been forced to deal with some really tough situations.  Bullying, lying, meanness, passiveness, apathy, you name it and sadly I'm not just talking from the kids here!  I've seen it from kids and adults.  I've witnessed parents 'in on it' if you will and have heard tales of them also getting in on the ribbing at their children's parties.  It's in those cases that I would say, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. 

Now, to be fair, I'm no saint.  I've spoken derogatorily against others and have come to regret my choice of words and even regretted voicing my thought.  But I have learned, am learning and hope to continue to learn how to deal with life's frustrating people, situations and what not.  What I have not done is made it my pursuit or encouraged my children to pursue the demise of another.  I have with ever bit of my being tried to encourage them to encourage others and get along no matter the situation. 

And then there comes a time when you must take a stand.  .....even if you're all lone.

I am intolerant to bullying and disgusted by passive behaviors toward it.  I am intolerant to spiteful meanness and disgusted by parents who encourage it or are 'unaware' of their child's behavior.  I am intolerant of lies and am disgusted by those who wish to explain them away as though they're ever acceptable, especially when the lie is to ones 'subjects' and spoken in an attempt to cover up sketch decision making.  These are the beliefs that make up the trunk of the tree that is ME. 

Like a tree I have many limbs, many paths and branch out in many different directions.  Like a tree some of my branches, behaviors if you will, are stronger and better than others.  Like a tree I've given off fruit - 2 to be exact and I can only hope that they garner what they need from me to get through this life, make good in this life and make God proud in this life from my trunk.  So that when it falls....in to life, the good, bad and ugly of it, it can re-nourish it's self and rise up again.  I hope my tree's fruit isn't bitter rather better.  Better for the example that I'm trying to set. 

And as we go forward from here decisions have to be made and this year they seem tougher than ever.  As a parent I encourage my kids to take part in the decision making process.  I encourage them to view all aspects, possible results and consequences of their choices.  I've always encouraged them to not quit.  Until now.  Sometimes quitting is necessary.  When the group you're associated with is MEAN and hurtful and there's no end in sight - enough is enough.  When talent walks away perhaps it's what needs to happen to open up eyes to what is really going on. 

Encourage. Encourage. Encourage!  Kindness. Kindness. Kindness.  Two elements when used together can achieve great things!  

What's holding up your tree?  What's the make up of your trunk?  And your fruit...wonderful to you as they are, are not without a blemish.  Can you buff it out?  Or has it began to rot, clear through to the core....and is now attempting to spoil the whole bunch?

I just gotta say...

Last night I took in a high school basket ball game between the Oak Hill Golden Eagles and Northwestern Tigers (?...not sure if they are tigers, but sure it was NW lol)  And what a game!  So good in fact it took 3 extra periods just to wrap it all up.  Although the team I was rooting for didn't come out with the 1 point advantage needed for a W, they experienced many victories on the court and unless they're made of stone, were or will be rewarded with personal victories as well.

Now I'm no coach and I certainly won't profess to be.  I am however a spectator an even more so a fan.  I'd say I'm a fan of the sport, but as I've matured, I find myself being more of a fan of sportsmanship, effort, encouragement, and stick-to-itiveness.  I witnessed each member of both teams playing with all they had.  I'm guessing many are sore, tired, and still mentally exhausted today from their efforts last night.  Two young men fouled out of the game in the OT's, both I believe were seniors.  And for young Mr. Spaulding it would be his last game on his high school court. Bittersweet.  So is the case for all the OH seniors who played last evening and as for the underclassmen, so many lessons to be learned from one game in my opinion. 

Overall it was an all-around effort for a W not just by the players on the court, but also from their bench, O-club, cheerleaders, and even the fans.  Last night can hardly be considered a loss.  When so much was overcome.  Congratulations to the Team, Coaches, and to the Fans.  I don't know about you but I'm excited for some IHSAA sectional action!  Let's go Oak Hill Golden Eagles!

some things

I wonder, how long until we as a society can no longer refer to Fat Tuesday as Fat?

And on that note...

It's been awhile since I've been here so I'm gonna do a bit of catching up on what's been going on in my little world and will undoubtedly throw in a few perspectives here and there.

Kathryn is continuing to meet with Dr.'s to try to determine why her Thyroid is enlarged and why the high level of calcitonin was in the pathology of her gallbladder.  She had a series of blood work done and result after result brought about good news and a more optimistic outlook!  PTL.  I attribute it all to God and the amazing prayer warriors in our lives.  She'll meet with a geneticist in March and an Endocrinologist at Riley.  As I think back on the whole process I can clearly see Gods hand in every aspect of what she's gone through.  From the Dr.'s, Lab personnel, timely service and diligent service.  He knows me well and that I am not patient when it comes to service from a hospital and He knows I fail at asking the necessary questions.  As a result, Kate received, at each visit, prompt service, and the consultations with the doctors were quite informative!  And get this, not once but twice the Endocrinologist from Dukes, Dr. Collie called me personally to relate Kathryn's lab results to me.  Yes indeed there are Dr.'s who still do that.  Who knew!  :)
As of now we are in a holding pattern.  Soon we will have the answers we were in search of.  In the mean time continued prayers would be greatly appreciated. Oh, I almost forgot, she had her Valentines formal and she looked beautiful.

Matt is doing well with his homeschooling.  Deciding to withdraw him from Oak Hill Jr. High school was one of the easiest and scariest decisions I've ever made.  Easiest because it was in my son's best interest.  Scariest because I don't want to fail him.  I have been reminded, daily how blessed I am to have been able to make such a decision.  God allowed me to work in that building for 4 years.  Not as a sub as I had been doing but rather as a permanent employee.  He opened my eyes to a myriad of situations, personalities, behaviors that ultimately solidified many questions I had swirling around in my head.  My eyes were opened to situations that were whispered about within this community and consequently a part of my heart was saddened.
Being at the Junior High and having sat in every class/subject in the 8th grade I was familiar, with what I needed to get across.  I didn't become a professional educator during that time but looking back I realize now the time spent there and my purpose were defined.
In the first week working with Matthew I came to realize he has incredible!!! recall.  This explains his boredom with homework and time spent with other students as the subject matter was hammered home.  I've learned that he doesn't like processes, writing out a critical thought, and he likes things to "flow" if you will.  He enjoys creative writing, is a sponge when it comes to reading, and is an excellent test taker.  I've realized that he needs to work on finding a way to 1) deal with the 'process' of learning that takes place in the classroom setting and not lose his focus.  2) rise above the ignorance of others.
The primary reason behind my withdrawing him wasn't due to an academic issue, rather bullying.  Bullying at all levels.  While Oak Hill Jr. High may not have a zero tolerance policy, I do.  And as I signed out my son on that Tuesday in January, I was half way through the double doors when I stopped, walked back into the school to see if the large banner that hangs across that hall that houses the classrooms, still hung and it did.  And for your information that banner states this "stand up for what is right even if you stand alone".  Upon seeing that, the confidence that I had in my decision grew leaps and bounds.

*side note:  I find it concerning as a parent, taxpayer, and at the core of it all a person - no matter how you choose to define me, that NOT ONE inquiry has been made from any Administrator as to WHY my son was withdrawn.  A young man who was involved with athletics, was solid academically, wasn't a disciplinary issue, who was well liked, and whose parents didn't move out of the system, was just removed.  I've heard for over 7 years that Oak Hill schools are experiencing a decline in enrollment.  I've seen promotional videos and read pamphlets designed to entice new students into the system, yet when one of their own leaves not an eye is batted, no concern registered, not to his parents.  Can the system afford this?  I know for fact Matthew was not the only jr. high student withdrawn, for my phone rang off the hook for the first 2 weeks after our decision to withdraw him. As a parent, community member, a person - this is concerning to me and should be to you also.  Oak Hill is a fine system academically, and has that data to back up such a claim, kudos to those teachers who get the job done...academically. But to the administration...I am saddened, deeply saddened.   **this is an opinion based on my personal experience. 

This month on Valentines day to be exact my brother and his wife celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary.  Not sure when exactly I realized it was to be their silver celebration, but when I did all I could think about was that mom would insist on some sort of recognition.  Because operating in a timely manner and my inability to adhere to deadlines, I knew getting something in the paper so that it would run at the appropriate time was out of the question.  So, I planned (kinda) in my spontaneous manner a rather impromptu gathering of family and friends.  In the process....as the proverbial ball was in motion, it was brought to my attention that my sis-in-law isn't a fan of surprises.  OOPS!  :/  So, I changed up a bit of the plan, cut back the guest list and threw an anniversary party for my brother!  lol  : )  Problem solved, crisis averted!  Kim and Eric were surprised, and appreciative.  However, not nearly as appreciative as I am to have them as Sis & Brother.  Words, parties, surprises, etc...cannot express how thankful I am for the two of them.  I'd be a fart in the wind through this entire process if it weren't for them.  Thanks, Kim & Eric....I love you both!

As it is with the first of the year, Andy has been gone a lot.  January always brings about a national sales meeting somewhere and like clockwork it falls on his 'home' week.  Therefore it's safe to say communication is strained, tensions are high, and  factor in the number of potential problems winter can have in store, and being a one man do-it-all-yourself kinda guy, January & February have been nuts.  The up side, is I have a sense of humor!  Am laid back enough for the two of us and F.R.O.G.

Kathryn's cheer-leading wraps up tonight (i think) as we play our last regular season game tonight against Northwestern.  I got my boobs squished today, first time since 2003.  And in a week and a day my least favorite month will be over!  March madness is around the corner, as are birthdays and spring breaks!  And I'm holding out hope that in typical March fashion we'll get PUMMELED with a snow storm!  :)  That would make me happy and send this winter out with a bang!

And now for the tidbits....
Have a sense of humor     Practice tolerance/acceptance     Take a stand      Have a voice 
Make a difference    Have some Faith     Feel     Cry when you feel like it     Be NICE! 
And last but not least, Don't argue with a fool....someone may overhear and not be able to tell who's who!

HAPPY FAT TUESDAY!
Loving my BIG BIG God today & always!

That common thread....

Have you ever noticed the random piece of thread woven into the nest of a bird?

It serves as an identifier.  I imagine it beckons the new to flight fledglings that 'this is home'.  I imagine it's woven into the nest in such a manner that it is crucial to the structure of the nest, keeping it strong in the midst of a storm.

I was thinking the other day about my circle of friends.  Unlike family, it's not blood that binds us or draws us together.  So what is it?  What's the common thread?  As I reflected on those relationships I could come up with several, religious beliefs, political beliefs, kids, extra curricular involvement...etc. But not one of those seemed to be THE one that was most binding.  So I thought a bit more.  And I came up with this, the majority of my friends are not from this community.  Although most are from the area, few are from the "oak hill" community.  We're outsiders if you will.  We're from Marion, Madison-Grant, Lewis Cass, Tri-County and Oak Hill.  And for whatever reason, this is the community we've chosen to live, raise our families, worship, etc.  It is here we came together.

We all have kids.  We all have a different place of worship.  We all have our own thing that we do.  And through it all we have come to view one another in a different light and perhaps one of the best lights one can be viewed in....that of a friend.

Just six years ago Andy & I felt as though we were missing that element.  Not that we didn't have friends, we did, just most of them lived farther away and getting together for the little things like ballgames and impromptu bonfires wasn't so easy to do.  And now the circle of friends is growing.  And I feel blessed.

There are those in the circle who have been friends longer than others, know others better, click better and all of that but nonetheless, I would say it's a pretty solid circle.

Solid perhaps because 70% of those in it are not from here.  Solid perhaps because we've realized the value of friends, have watched and learned from the dynamics of other groups of friends, or solid perhaps because we're all true to who we are.  Whatever the reason they are friendships I treasure and look forward to growing.

For me personally the common thread, not being from the Oak Hill community initially, seems to be the one that ultimately binds me to these people. This is a tightly knit community, a patchwork of many.  Many who have never left, many who have returned and many who have moved in.

Like a bird looking for that tread, the indicator that 'this is where you belong', I've found just that in the common thread that is woven in my friendships. I hope they have too. 

2012...the year of trying new things? pehaps!

Well, since I've acquired a new addiction, Pinterest I thought it would perhaps be a more beneficial addiction if I would not just pin the things I like but to actually make them.  So, for starters I decided to try out the recipes that I've pinned and give a report.  One of the first things I tried were cinnamon roll waffles.  YUM!  And easy peasy!  Simply pop open a tube of cinnamon rolls, place in the waffle maker and proceed as though you were making waffles.  Drizzle with the icing and enjoy!  really that simple and far quicker than waiting for them to bake!    

In addition to the above I tried a little something new for the Superbowl bash hosted by our good friends the Ankenbrucks!  CRACK!  ....lol!  got ya wondering huh?  Well, it's not crack as it is known on the street, however according to Pinterest, it's crack in the sense that it is oh so addicting.  I personally cannot attest to this fact as I was too stuffed to even try it, however I noticed my good friend Anne hovering around it throughout the evening.  It was a rather simple pleasure to concoct.  And seeing as though only the bottom remained I would say it was a hit!  Simply acquire a round sourdough bread already baked, cut it diagonally both directions, and stuff the cuts with cheddar cheese 8 oz., Real bacon bits 3 oz, and then top with a melted mixture of 1 stick of butter and 2 tbsp. of dry ranch dressing mix.  YUM!  Bake at 350 for 15 min. wrapped in foil and then unwrapped for an additional 10 min.  Again, easy peasy!

Tonight I'm trying Baked Cream Cheese Spaghetti Pasta!  YUM....If it meets my standards I'll besure to post the how to's of it all soon!

If you're curious about what I find interesting or worth a "pin" feel free to join Pinterest and follow me.
http://pinterest.com/

You'll be accepted into the sight quicker if you have an invite!  so if you need one just comment on my FB page and I'll gladly send one to you! 

948-5563

Well, I'm sure you had mixed feelings about the last 2 days.!!  On the up side, many people some you know and love dearly got great deals (free) to continue the crafting!  And those who paid, well....their deals were pretty awesome too.  On the down side, we sold nothing that ended in .98 and everything went CHEAP!  With that said we still have a TON of stuff!  My goodness you really kept everything! 

You were so creative.  As I saw item after item leave in the hands of another who shared your passion I would experience bits of panic .....panic that I'd never be able to get another thing that had your touch on it.  Not a good feeling.  There's something comforting about the signs you painted with all the sayings in addition the floral designs are now a one of a kind.  I selected more pieces to add to my already growing collections of MOM made stuffs.  Assuring that when the time comes both Kathryn and Matthew will have something from grandma mo to decorate their dwellings with.

Here's the funny of it all.  I do have a few creative juices flowing through my veins, I am after all YOUR daughter.  And this week my girlfriend expressed her interest in rehabing some of the things she loves and is toying with the idea of having sales or a shop at some point.  As I told Eric, I don't enjoy the same kind of crafting as you did.  I have no desire to make several items for sale and I absolutely hate to have sales of any kind (thanks!) but do have a desire to make somethings.  Random items....and who knows where that will lead.  We collectively joked about a day when we'd open a shop called "Monies!"  lol  NOT!

Anyway, there's still much to go through and much to do!  PTL for Kim!  I truly just follow her lead.  She and Eric keep me informed and reeled in if you will, because you know me, I'd just walk away from it all. 

I love you and miss you mom!  And if there's one thing I've learned throughout this process it's to THROW STUFF AWAY!   Or at the very least re-purpose it or give it to someone who will need/use it more than I!  I know for sure when we move there will be a MAJOR PURGE of all previously owned items.! 

tid bits...

Well as many of you know and perhaps have experienced your selves, the new year brings to the forefront new goals or perhaps old goals revisited.  I don't make new years resolutions, rather I just continue to try to improve upon me and be more pleasing to my God...it's an ongoing process like many resolutions.  I do want to share a few things that I've experienced and can attest to their success.  (keep in mind success is not without effort)

Financially I don't think there's a better program out there than FPU - aka, Financial Peace University!  A program developed by Dave Ramsey (or promoted by him) with a step by step program to recovery from debt.  Bottom line, IT WORKS.   If you're not familiar, google it.  http://www.daveramsey.com

Healthily (is that a word?) I recommend Advocare.  As many of you know I'm not much into dieting and such.  Food is my friend.  But having done the 24 day challenge I can attest to this, I feel better, have kept off the weight for over a year and WANT to eat more healthy.  Aside from Hardee's and their creation of the Steakhouse burger, fast food is rather unappealing.  Over the course of the 24 day's several things happen both physically, nutritionally, and mentally.  The program begins with a cleanse, eliminating the yuck, alters your diet yet doing so in a manner that is totally tolerable, and restores energy.  No joke when I tell you that on the 8th day of the program I had to MOVE!!!!  The addition of movement only enhanced the results.  And somewhere along the line my desire for food changed.  It was still there, but I really had a turned up nose for that food that was "bad" for me.  So, give it a try.  Not sure where to get it?....hit me up, Andy sells it.

https://www.advocare.com/10075946/


Inspiration comes from many different places.  However I feel pretty certain that 2012 will go down in history as the year of Pinterest.  What is Pinterest you ask?  Well it's a site full of pin boards.  What are pin boards?  Boards created with ideas that have been virtually "pinned" to them.  Why?  you ask...well, why not?!  It's not necessarily a user friendly site, as I had to do a lot of random clicking and roaming to really get the gist of it.  Ultimately I figured it out and within a day or so of visiting became addicted.  Pinterest has a little bit of everything: party ideas, decorating ideas, style ideas, sayings, organization ideas, crafts, diy, food (oh the food), and it goes on & on & on!  What's uber neat about the site is it allows you to see what others have found and pinned, what they find interesting and you too get to share with others what appeals to you!  It's somewhat unusual in that you need an invite to get started pinning, but you don't need one to browse.  If you're not yet a pinner on Pinterest, but are curious and would like to be I'll be glad to send you an invite, just let me know.  In the mean time give it a looksy at http://pinterest.com/

Well, that's it from me for today.  Blessing to each of you & remember, it's never to late to start!  every day is a new beginning!
<3

948-5563

Hey, Mom...
I don't think i've called yet this year.  I have however talked to you daily ;).  We're only 20 days in and so much has happened already!  So much so that a part of me is glad you're where you're at because I feel it would only cause you more worry and concern and I would hate for that to happen, when in fact in the long run everything is for the best.  It's just a change.

We received good news regarding Kathryns' ultrasound on her thyroid.  No cancer!  Praise the Lord!!!!  Her thyroid is enlarged and we go monday to have it tested to see what's up with that.  Dr. said it wasn't unusual for a teenage girl to have an enlarged thyroid, so...I'm sure it'll all be ok. 

All that praying you've done over the years for Matthew and him getting along ok at school, well it all came full circle a couple of weeks ago and I withdrew him.  We're finishing up the year homeschooling and he'll return to regular school in the fall for high school.  It's been good.  We've had a lot of opportunity to talk about Life and all it can throw at you and people and just how they're different everywhere you go and how to deal with all of those things.  It's been interesting to say the least.  I sure don't remember lessons like these when I was in Jr. High.  And I certainly don't remember adults turning a blind eye.  Times they are a changing, and I'm not convinced it's all good.  Change is fine, but why abandon those practices that work just for the sake of change.?  A universal question I'm sure.

I'm doing well.  There's a great peace with in me that I can only attribute to my God and my faith.  I miss you terribly ....but you know that. Sometimes I get jealous because I feel as though you're getting a full view of our lives....the heads up if you will and the assurance in knowing!!!  all will be well.  And I don't know, but there's something comforting to me knowing you're with our God.  It's as though I've got my two biggest fans watching out for me.  win win right?

I've found it easier to rid myself of those things/people in my life that would like to bring me down.  No time for them other than the time spent praying for them.  That's all I can do.  ....needless to say, I pray a lot. ;)  Especially living where I do and my "un"willingness, if you will, to go with the flow.  I guess Fairmount produced more than one Rebel.  (lol) Only my cause is my Family. 

Mom, you have held onto a lot of stuff!  ;P   How many times did I suggest you purge!  Oh MY GOODNESS!  It's all so overwhelming.  haha.  Guessing you knew that and that's why YOU didn't ever go through it all.  If it were not so neatly stashed away I'd say you might've been able to be in an episode of Hoarders.  Neatly stashed away Hoarders.  Talk about an ordeal.  Kim has been doing an amazing job.

On the home fronts...Amboy is still for sale and getting close & closer to being completed.  God Love my husband!!  Swayzee came off the market, but is obviously still going to be sold, but we didn't want the hassle of showing it while we were living here & working on it.  Our offer has been extended on the home we want to purchase. And I would love to see Kim & Eric in your place in the next few months.  There's a water leak....so that's being tended to and they both have great ideas to make it their own.  You should be proud of yourself  for being able to hang on to the houses.  You did it!  You won! 

Keep watching over us if you will.  Especially Andy in his travels over the next two weeks.  And over Kathryn, we have labs on Monday and Matthew.  Although nothing particular for Matt anymore, other than he continue to grow, be healthy and be happy!  I really sense things are coming together for him. 

Mom, I love you.  Miss you terribly....feel free to visit any time you like. 

I'll talk to you later. 

He's baaaacccckkkkk!

Matthew that is!  What an amazing 180 has taken place in his personality.  It's the kid we all know and love!  Returned from some dark place he was forced to go.  It's so refreshing and yet sad all at the same time.  He hasn't balked at going with us to ballgames, outings, church, youth, etc...rather he's up and at it & usually one of the first ready to go!  And once we arrive where ever, it's not long before he's with his friends. 

I give praises to the Lord that my son was/is strong enough, and confident enough in himself and knows that "the Lord doesn't make junk" that he didn't resort to harming himself like so many kids who feel bullied, left out, shoved aside, overlooked do.  I am thankful that as parents Andy and I kept lines of communication open with our kids and that they felt safe enough to express their concerns and share what was happening during the course of their day, something most teens choose not to.  I am thankful to the Lord for the clarity and strength to do what I needed to do for my son, and our family.

Phone calls to parents I feel would've been futile, and frankly where do you stop.  As far as Administration goes, well....it is what it is and until the board decides on a change it will remain the same. 

I do want to correct or clear up something that I have put out there regarding the school I withdrew our son from.  There are teachers in that building who care immensely.  And they are very good teachers at that.  The quality of teachers and education is the primary reason we selected this particular school system.  It's not perfect and I am sure many other systems deal with similar problems as ours but over all I would be hard pressed to speak a negative word against MOST of the teaching staff.  (you can read about one in particular in a previous blog from 2010 I believe)

Regardless, our son is BACK and thriving!  and it's only been a week!  As he left this morning with his dad for the next couple of days he grabbed his new text books, and said he'd besure to "face time" me so that we could go over his lessons.  Wow initiative at that!  It's as though he's matured 4 years already! 

He's a great kid and such a joy.  Such a BLESSING!  Thanks to everyone for all the prayers.
 

The good stuff....

The good news is....

Matthew begins his home schooling adventure today.  We're starting with US History and the Civil War.  I'm excited as it's my favorite subject.  And the fact that today's lesson will take place fireside is that much more exciting.  Love this kid more than life itself!  He is truly a joy! 

Kathryn had an excellent gymnastic lesson last night.  I love when she comes away optimistic and accomplished.  In addition she made the semester honor roll!  Even though she missed several days she managed to stay on top of her lessons.  She's still on track for her Honors diploma!  She (as well as us) is so excited about that! 


The past week I've have been blessed to see Gods plan in action.  What a blessing and comfort to know He has a plan!  With clarity I was able to approach 2 very different situations involving my kids and respond in a manner that I can be proud of and make decisions with clarity that many view as brave, difficult, hard etc.... 

I said this would be a year of change and sure enough two short weeks in and we've dealt with quite a bit of change already.  And it's all been GOOD! 

I would ask for continued prayer for Kathryn as we meet with her pediatrician on Monday to go over tests that need ran before we meet with endocrinologist in Ft. Wayne.  Prayers for Matthew that he continues to heal emotionally and grow more confident.  He's a fine young man, strong in so many ways and already we've seen a huge difference in his personality!  Far less frustration and more of the happy go lucky Matthew we all love so much!  Even Kathryn has said how "nice he is to her".  (she was on the receiving end of his frustration)  Prayers for me too as I head down this path!  It's sure to be an adventure and I with out a doubt know that God has placed it on my heart to take this step. 

One final note...thank you for reading my silly little blog.  It's nothing special, serves no purpose rather than a place for me to speak my mind, say what's on my heart, and even a time or two shake things up.  Although you can happen upon my page by chance, many have expressed to receive notice when I blog, hence the blah blah blog group.  With that said, there have been visitors to my blog who are not a part of the group, but rather acquire the blog address from someone other than myself and who are not supportive.  And to them I say, leave and don't come back.  Odds are you don't like what I have to say, you don't like my opinion or point of view.  Bottom line is not all opinions are shared, mine included and it is OK to see things differently.  AND it is OK to have a voice. 

So there you have it.  This is again where I say what please, not always pleasing others with what I say. 
I am Kelly, I have an opinion & I have a voice.  I am woman hear me roar!  ;P  haha!

Follow your gut.....

...and when it's the size of mine you're sure to find your way. 

No kidding.

If there's one thing i've learned not to do that is to not second guess myself.  I knew going into a situation that it was not one i wanted to be in.  not one that felt good.  and not one that i wanted to last for long.  YAY i was granted my wish.  however the reasoning behind it all questionable, given the source - well, i'm not surprised.

I am now as i should be.  Home.  No longer employed .....

only concern...how to pay for nails & data plan!  lol 

I'll figure it out.

Van Ness Academy.....enrollment 1

Here at the Van Ness Academy we will start our day out with a hug.  We will learn and laugh and repeat the process.  We will discuss and debate.  We will motivate and challenge.  We will encourage one another. 

You see, the decision to open the Van Ness Academy wasn't really a hard one to make.  As a parent you want the best for your child.  And I for one feel that only the parent of that child can make that best decision.  Other parents, family and friends I'm sure might have you interest at heart, but ultimately only the parent can make the best decision. 

Choosing to not conform isn't a bad thing.  As a matter of fact it's a great thing! God has set us apart.  Has said to not be of this world.  Yet, this is the world we reside in.  With all it's beauty and good there is also ugly and bad.  And the ugly and bad will undoubtedly take it's toll over time.  To what extent varies with each individual. 

Matt's request to be home schooled isn't an escape route.  Rather it's one made so that he can be the BEST Matthew possible. And I thank God for allowing me to be able to clearly with out pause to be able to grant his wish.  In addition speaking through Pastor Walker Sunday morning casting out any doubts should they exist.  And he did so with these points :

• There is no fear in love....
• Do you feel like others are against you? ....Gods favor is upon you, therefore don't feel that way
• God will intercede in your life and bless you
• This is My commandment to love one another.

I love my son, and my God thus I have no fear in the path that is put before us.  When I asked Matt if he felt as though others were against him, he said at times.  Yet he knows he has purpose.  Given the chain of events that led up to our ultimate decision, I felt with great certainty that God interceded in our life, that moment and gave us reason & clarity.  And the final bullet point, ....ironically, it's what has confounded my son all along.  How do people just not love one another.  Really, is kindness all that difficult to muster? 

It's as though a breath from heaven has breathed new life into a young man who was caught up in a tide pool.  For that alone I praise the Lord. 

We certainly are not going with the grain here, no longer a part of the team, no longer a traditional student, but confident in who we are and what it is God would have us do. 

I've said many times on FB that this year would be full of change.  I've challenged others to be the change they want to see in others.  And I've been called to the task of being/doing just that.  The irony, hanging in the jr. high that my son attended is a banner that says "stand up for what's right even if you're standing alone", our twist...."standing up for what's right now has me standing at home." 

OH NO.....MY KNEES ARE FAT! HOW DID THAT HAPPEN????

Yes you read the title correct and it's not a metaphor for anything it's straight up FACT :/ 

My knees are fat. 

So are other parts, i'm not delusional, but really my Knees!!!  how does that happen?  Does your body say to it's self "whoa there!  belly is maxed out, so it her hind end so keep on moving boys,  (boys are the cause of fat, i'm sure so therefore for fat will be identified as male) there you go....just a little farther, as others are sure to follow and will surely deposit themselves in her thighs, so it's the knees for you"  Really, this has got to be the dialogue that takes place. 

Even at my chubbiest i've never really had body image issues.  I've always been pretty happy just the way I am.  I grew up with 2 heavy set parents.  One, my father never seemed to give it much thought.  Probably because he was the smallest in his family as they were all really large.  My mom on the other hand was "big boned", the product of 2 relatively small people and never seemed happy in her own skin.  Ever.  :(  I even over heard her once tell a friend on the phone "i never wanted to have a girl because i never wanted her to be big like me."  Mind you when i overheard this convo I was far from large.  As in miles away.  Dr.'s used to tell me i needed to gain weight!  (can you imagine)  If they could see me now & what success i've become!  ;p  haha

I look at it this way, I'm not the biggest, nor the smallest. I'm me and whatever the size, pound, etc...I am who I am.  At no point has my shape, size ever defined me nor do i believe it ever will. 

But really?  My knees.!  ahaha I really have to laugh about it because ...well, frankly i find it amusing.  Curiously amusing.  What's next?  My ankles...thus becoming cankles?  And if fat, thick or full ankles are cankles what does that make my fat, thick knees?  cknees?  (jw)

I came painfully aware of my cknees when the "fat" surrounding my knee cap continued to move once i became idol.  really?  YES!  I was so astonished that i tested what i was feeling, and sure enough ....continued movement.  drat!  haha

So, as a result of my recent discovery of my cknees and in a attempt to avoid cankles, i have resumed my exercise program: zumba & walking!  I'm in search of the day when i wrap up a zumba routine and my cknees STOP moving too!  And who knows with luck....the more important result will be achieved....an improved over all health. 

You see, God has added one more day to this year to accomplish my goal...it's as though He's said "ok, you just need a bit more time!....you got it! in the form of Feb. 29!  Now get to it!"  So I'm off on a mission.  (& better yet, i'm not alone!)

Hello & goodbye cknees! :)

books

Who here likes to read?  Who here enjoys a good laugh?  Who here has a sense of humor?  ME ME ME.

I must contribute my love of reading to my friend Marsha Vermilion. (shout out!)  She's my English/Lit teacher friend who reestablished in me the need for a good read.  I explained to her my problem, I need to be hooked right away, and with out much thought or consideration she gave me Fine Things by Danielle Steele.  I only know it was by Danielle Steele and remember that for two reasons, 1) i looked to see who the author was & 2) Marsha lent the book to me with a disclaimer that 'she typically wouldn't recommend a Danielle Steele book but that this was good from cover to cover', or something along those lines.  And there you have it.  I like to read.

My preferred genre seems somewhat all over the place but mostly light hearted.  Many of you know for 4 years I worked in a Jr. High setting and with many kids who found reading a challenge.  And the occasional teen who actually enjoyed it.  Due to my circumstance I began to read books that would appeal to teens and would make my recommendations.  So much so that I acquired quite a library of books, primarily for teen girls.  In addition my daughter is quite the reader, however she has a tendency to NOT read any of my suggestions.  Since I also worked with some boys I would force myself to read "boy stuff" just so I could assist them some too.  Again, my son is quite a reader and we have ZERO similarities in our preferred taste in books.  ho hum.  It's all really ironic that my kids and I don't share the same taste in books, as it was my initial panic that someday I'll have raised an illiterate kid, one who detests books and who will inevitably suffer through school/college because they hated to read.  Whew, crisis averted!

After having left the school (happy day) I continued my teen genre but soon realized I had zero to converse about with friends who were readers and therefore it was time to move on.

On to my grown up reading.  As I'm blogging about this I'm desperately trying to remember the first 'adult' read.  All though the title escapes me, I remember being shocked by the adult content.  ...remember i'd been in "G" mode for some time.  :)  And then one day while walking with my girlfriend Heather Nestleroad something I said made her chuckle and she commented that I reminded her of an author she has read, Jen Lancaster, and that I should read her books.  Ironically, later that week Ms. Lancaster was on the Today show promoting her current (at the time) memoir, My Fair Lazy and as they say the rest is history.  I began with book one, if you will, Bitter Is The New Black, and consequently followed it up with the remaining 4: Bright Lights, Big Ass,  Such A Pretty Fat, Pretty in Plaid,  and My Fair Lazy.  I was hooked from the first line.  YAY as that is what it takes for me.  She has also completed a novel, If You Were Here and it too provided great reading enjoyment.  For my between books Jen Lancaster fix I follow her blog at Jennsylvania.com.  An 80's girl, home grown - 1984 Huntington North grad, who tends to say what many think she's sure to make you chuckle.  And If you too are an 80's chick who couldn't wait for the next John Hughes movie, her books are a must read.

In addition to the above mentioned author, I've also read some of her book suggestions and so far so good.  Good Enough to Eat, by Stacey Ballis is just one of her recommendations and I to will recommend it.  It's light hearted read and certainly provided chuckles.  Karyn Bosnak is also quite enjoyable.  Twenty Times A Lady was made into a movie (What's Your Number) and Save Karyn is oh so relate-able and will leave you wondering "why didn't I think of that".  Currently I'm reading With A Little Luck  by Caprice Crane.  As I am only on chapter 4 a thorough review is unavailable, however, so far so good!

I call the above books and suggested read from Lancaster 'chick flick' books.  They're entertaining and relate-able on some level.  There's humor for sure so if you're void of any, (odd that you're here) so you might ignore all my suggestions and still with the daily newspaper.

On occasion I'll venture into the Historical Fiction genre.  I love medieval reads, anything to do with the Salem Witch trials and the Holocaust.  Want a suggestion or have one to share just let me know.

After mom passed I read Heaven is For Real.  Comforting, encouraging and hopeful the book really brought life and death into perspective for me.  If you've lost a loved one this is a must read.

I enjoy quick, light hearted reads that make me smile and laugh and even on occasion shed a tear.  And if it isn't apparent to you yet I mostly enjoy the laughter.  So, if you're in search of a chuckle, and wonder where to begin, reread paragraph 5 and start with book 1.  Keep in mind...a sense of humor is required.

HAPPY READING

wrap up

Well the Holiday season came & went.  That just about sums it up really.  No pomp and very little holiday cheer if you will.  Many friends, acquaintances stopped me to inquire if I ever got around to putting up a tree.  Yes, 3 days before the big day.

Really since July 22nd my mind has been foggy yet reflective, my heart broken yet beating and my world...well it didn't crumble.  It changed.  It shifted.  Not like our current president "change" but good & necessary change.  Some of you might wonder how I could begin to classify the change brought about by the passing of my mother good.  Well, it's really rather simple.  She's no longer in pain.  She no longer is confined by her disabilities.  She is no longer alone.  But for me, most importantly she cartwheeled all the way through the pearly gates.  That I am sure of. 

The necessary aspect of change brought about in my world since this summer has been the personal transformation that I seem to be experiencing.  It's on going.  As it has 45 years of walls, habits, attitudes, etc that need broken down, tweaked, adjusted and built back up.  Probably the most apparent aspect of this life that I needed to work on, focus on is the simplicity of what is expected from me.  (from all of us really.)  I've realized I needed to declutter, if you will MANY areas of my existence.  Practice what I preach to my kids.  You know the whole "do unto others...." concept.  I needed to rid my self from negativity which is for sure a work in progress as IT IS EVERYWHERE and so easily creeps into conversations, attitudes, etc....  My focus has been on the Lord and being kind.  It's all really that simple. 

With those things as my focus I've experienced improved relations with my own family, immediate & extended, and with friends.  I smile more (didn't really think that was possible) and make it a point to pass it along to others.  It's simple but it feels good, ...to all involved.  I've come to trust in the Lord and the fact that his timing is perfect.  And give Him props for all the comfort I've received.  When you feel it, the comfort, TRULY feel it, when you're all alone, you know with out a doubt you are in His arms.  *sigh*

As the new year begins I am still amidst several loose ends.  With moms passing my brother & I inherited her 2 properties.  For those of you counting that brings my house total to 4.  That's right 4!  I really only want 1. :)  Both Amboy & Swayzee are listed for sale.  However if I get my way, Swayzee will come off the market until all interior projects are finished.  (oh the life of a wife of a do-it-your-selfer...ugh!)  We're still intending on moving, and would love to be able to do so within the next 3 mos. or so.  Feel free to send up a prayer for patience and a buyer as we continue through this journey.  It is my hope that my brother and his wife will be able to move into moms.  It's would be great to keep it in the family.  That just seems right.  And I'd love for them to really make it their own.  That house has some really neat aspects and great potential.  Prayers for them that it all works out.

We are yet to meet with an endocrinologist for Kathryn.  She had her gallbladder removed in November and pathology indicated she is high risk for Thyroid Cancer...a really rare form of it.  So once again prayers for her are greatly appreciated.  Again props to God, as had she not had the surgery, and pathology test we never would've known the risk.  His timing is perfect as is His plan.

Over the holiday break the greatest bless has just been my family.  Although we tend to venture off into our own spaces and since Christmas electronics have consumed us, we are TOGETHER.   And really that's what matters.  We had Christmas eve as usually with my in-laws and shared not only good food but laughs. (priceless) and returned to their home again on Christmas day after Church services.  The following friday was spent with my brother & his kids, minus one :( and again good food, laughter & memories.  It was all pretty simple yet splendid at the same time.

Obviously this was the first year I had to decorate graves.  I only tended to moms and grandma & grandpas.  I did something different from what mom would've done.  I'm sure it was no surprise to her. ;P  It was a season with out mom.  No open house, no insane amount of decorating, crafts, and panic for it "not all getting done!"  What got done got done.  It was different.  It was simple.  It wasn't about any one of us....It was about the birth of a newborn King.  This year I was truly reflective on that.  This year i was truly appreciative of my family and friends.  This year there was change and it was good. 

As 2012 is upon us I challenge you to live simply, and to simply live.  Share a smile, make a new friend, be a friend, share some kindness.  This year BElieve THEre is GOOD in the world.  A positive change can change the world and it can start with you.  Also, if you don't know Him....I challenge you to seek & find & get to know Him. 
He's waiting.

Happy 2012.  Love to you all & blessing all the year long.